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658209 Posts in 9262 Topics by 3396 Members Latest Member: - vlozan86 Most online today: 44 - most online ever: 494 (Jul 01, 2007, 02:59:53 PM)
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Author Topic: God Damn Job, Now, Finally, In Its Right Forum, So Everyone Whose Brain Has Been  (Read 35812 times)
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girl
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« Reply #425 on: Aug 09, 2008, 11:38:01 PM »

So, today at work, I'm talking to a customer about skincare for the teenage girl she has with her. She also has a toddler in a stroller, I'm not good with ages, but he was old enough to talk, and right in the middle of the conversation, she squats down near the stroller, lifts her t-shirt over the toddler's head and starts to breastfeed him. WTF, people?
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Andrew_TSKS
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« Reply #426 on: Aug 09, 2008, 11:41:54 PM »

People are breastfeeding later and later these days, or at least I think that's what's going on based on the fact that I hear stories like that more and more often.

I know personally that if I could remember sucking milk out of my mother's tits I would be way more demented than I already am, and since I can remember being 2 years old reasonably well, I feel like 2 has to be the cutoff. But I hear about people continuing to do it on an occasional basis right til they send their 5 year olds off to school--or even longer. And that WIGS ME OUT.
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girl
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« Reply #427 on: Aug 09, 2008, 11:47:31 PM »

He was old, yes. But also, he wasn't fussing at all and she was in the middle of a conversation with me, for fuck's sake. I mean, at least finish talking and excuse yourself. It's been crazy people all week this week, so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.

edit: also, I'm not an expert, but I would think that once your child has teeth, he's probably ready to eat other things.
« Last Edit: Aug 09, 2008, 11:51:43 PM by girl » Logged

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Ignatius
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« Reply #428 on: Aug 10, 2008, 12:21:22 AM »

I have a friend who ate breastmilk until he was five.  He had a younger brother, it made him jealous or something, and his ma thought it's be all right if they shared.  Anywho, he turned out AWESOME and not demented.
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Greg Nog
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« Reply #429 on: Aug 10, 2008, 12:23:02 AM »

People are breastfeeding later and later these days

I don't think that's a big trend; from what I can tell, there's always been a pretty huge range in when ladies decide to start the wean.

For the record, I fully support mamas unleashing their mammaries on the unsuspecting public at every possible opportunity.
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Ignatius
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« Reply #430 on: Aug 10, 2008, 01:02:06 AM »

Just imagine if the feeding was a boys' job!
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Thermofusion
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« Reply #431 on: Aug 10, 2008, 01:22:09 AM »

I'm cool with the concept of breastfeeding out in the open, but the prude/man of polite manners within me says you should always say "excuse me" before excreting bodily fluids of any type in public.
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Andrew_TSKS
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« Reply #432 on: Aug 10, 2008, 02:16:22 AM »

Technically, Thermo, this would be "secreting" rather than "excreting", since breast milk is not waste.

Ignatius, your friend does not have the same mom that I have. I don't know if, had I some other perhaps less insane/bitchy mom, whether being able to remember breastfeeding would be no big deal. As it is, I can tell you, it would be a big fucking deal. I'd be in a straitjacket in a padded room somewhere telling a therapist about it. And the therapist would be in another room looking at me through a shatterproof window.
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Greg Nog
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« Reply #433 on: Aug 10, 2008, 09:53:50 AM »

We won't send you on a trip down mammary lane, then.  Keep it like a secretion.
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dumbfish
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« Reply #434 on: Aug 10, 2008, 12:05:00 PM »

Oh, Nog.

My inappropriate nursing story: A friend has Alabama relatives. Eating dinner down there with them, he noticed that the four year-old wasn't eating. The kid was sitting in his mother's lap, playing with some toys for most of the meal. Dan figured the kid had already eaten. Then, kiddo started getting fussy, so his mom asked him what he wanted.
"Mama, titty!"
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YojimboMonkey
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« Reply #435 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:11:51 PM »

He was old, yes. But also, he wasn't fussing at all and she was in the middle of a conversation with me, for fuck's sake. I mean, at least finish talking and excuse yourself. It's been crazy people all week this week, so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.

edit: also, I'm not an expert, but I would think that once your child has teeth, he's probably ready to eat other things.

Babies start getting their teeth in at around 6 months.  Up to a year of age, a mother's milk is all the nourishment a baby needs, though of course if someone wants to supplement that of course they can.

And to all of you, it is certainly none of your business how long a woman chooses to nurse her child.  I mean, a woman can do what she wants with her body unless it involves feeding her child?  WTF?  I advise you to take a look at La Lache League International's web site and educate yourselves.
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Andrew_TSKS
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« Reply #436 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:14:40 PM »

She's welcome to nurse her baby until it's 8 years old if she's OK with me thinking that's sick and wrong.
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dumbfish
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« Reply #437 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:16:34 PM »

It's no one else's right but mine to determine how often, and how publicly, I am to air out my wang.
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YojimboMonkey
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« Reply #438 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:19:54 PM »

If you're using that wang to feed a child, it's not the airing out that I'm going to have issues with.
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Thermofusion
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« Reply #439 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:26:23 PM »

My problem remains not with public breastfeeding (something I'm cool with and support, even if I will openly admit it still makes me feel a little uncomfortable...just something I'll have to get over) but the fact that she didn't offer an "excuse me" or something of the like.  From the way girl described it, she just flowed right into breastfeedin' right in the middle of the conversation, which seems kind of rude on a couple different levels. 
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YojimboMonkey
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« Reply #440 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:33:38 PM »

I can dig that--though the discussion had veered away from that--but to play Devil's Advocate here, it was probably an "automatic pilot" kind of thing, where it is just so normal for her to stick the kid on the boob that it didn't necessarily occur to her how it might make someone else uncomfortable. 
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girl
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« Reply #441 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:41:40 PM »

Thermo's right. It's not that it made me uncomfortable, it's that it was really rude. It would have been almost as rude if she took a call on her cell phone mid sentence. (Also, squatting down in the middle of the store in a mall is not the proper place for breastfeeding. I don't really want to start a debate about it, but it's just not. I mean, you wouldn't pull stuff out of your bag and make a sandwich in the middle of the floor, would you? Not if you were a sane person. You'd go sit down somewhere. I'd say the same rules should apply.)
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YojimboMonkey
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« Reply #442 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:48:47 PM »

Chris, nothing but love here, but you (and some others) commented on the appropriate age limit for breastfeeding a child and I took issue with that and responded to that.  Then later I gave a hypothetical excuse for the lady who breastfed her child in front of you.  If you have a problem with the venue and the situation, that's fine, you were there and I wasn't.  I'll take your word for it that it was rude.  But it really is none of your business how long somebody breastfeeds her child, your comment started off a series of ignorant comments, and I attempted to stop that.
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girl
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« Reply #443 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:53:40 PM »

No, we're good.  Heart
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Andrew_TSKS
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« Reply #444 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:57:05 PM »

I guess I'm the one who isn't good.
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dumbfish
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« Reply #445 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:58:25 PM »

Yoj, do you not think that there is a point that continued breastfeeding would negatively affect the child's development? If a good friend said she wanted to breastfeed her kid until he was 12, you'd think, "Sounds strange, but not my business" and say nothing?
Assuming you think 12-- an age where I recall masturbating and studying dad's Playboys quite closely-- is too old, now all we're talking about is where the line sits. Andrew's suggesting that kids old enough to remember it might be too old. I might go higher-- probably before kid starts school, certainly before the kid's having active sexual thoughts-- but certainly there's a point where I think it's a bad idea.
No one's suggesting legislation setting such a limit, so I don't see a need for the high and mighty tone. Pretty sure we're all pro-mom (in the general sense-- may have to exclude Andrew's) here.
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girl
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« Reply #446 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:58:26 PM »

No, we're good.  Heart


(you're allowed a different opinion from Jim, you know.)  Heart
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girl
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« Reply #447 on: Aug 10, 2008, 11:59:18 PM »

that page break can be such a sneaky fucker, you know?
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YojimboMonkey
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« Reply #448 on: Aug 11, 2008, 12:20:45 AM »

Yoj, do you not think that there is a point that continued breastfeeding would negatively affect the child's development?

Sure.  I think my second son was nursed a little too long, and I discussed it with my wife quite a bit back then.  I think I should be allowed in that decision.  I don't think you should be.

If a good friend said she wanted to breastfeed her kid until he was 12, you'd think, "Sounds strange, but not my business" and say nothing?

Do you mind telling me where a good friend came into the discussion?  Andrew said that it WIGS HIM OUT that a hypothetical complete stranger might breastfeed a child past the age of 2.  You told a second-hand story.  Chris said that as a general rule she thought that a kid with teeth ought to be eating something else.  If I had a good friend who was considering nursing to such an extreme age, as a good friend it might behoove me to say something to her.  But..

Assuming you think 12-- an age where I recall masturbating and studying dad's Playboys quite closely-- is too old, now all we're talking about is where the line sits. Andrew's suggesting that kids old enough to remember it might be too old. I might go higher-- probably before kid starts school, certainly before the kid's having active sexual thoughts-- but certainly there's a point where I think it's a bad idea.
No one's suggesting legislation setting such a limit, so I don't see a need for the high and mighty tone. Pretty sure we're all pro-mom (in the general sense-- may have to exclude Andrew's) here.

No?  Andrew said "cutoff," you said "inappropriate," yadda yadda.  You say that you're not trying to legislate anything, but you want to figure out "where the line sits?"  What line are you trying to define if not the line where you can say, "that is wrong?"  Maybe you don't want to legislate it but you want to judge, and you want to point and laugh.  To make a similar comment to Andrew's, maybe you have a right to say "that's fucked up, that WIGS ME OUT, haha look at those backwards Alabama people and their mama titty kid," but I also have a right to call you an asshole for saying it.

And I don't think I've ever been high and mighty but you guys are pushing a button of mine.
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Andrew_TSKS
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« Reply #449 on: Aug 11, 2008, 12:32:41 AM »

The problem with discussing issues like this is that people who've put their opinions on such issues into practice tend to feel like no one who hasn't done the same thing has a right to express their opinions. And then the people who expressed their opinions despite not having put them into practice feel like they're being invalidated unfairly. So everybody gets offended, and to some extent I think everybody has a right to be. Because on one side people are saying "it's my opinion that this thing you did with your kid is a bad idea", and on the other side people are saying "it's my opinion that you don't have a right to an opinion on this issue". Those are both offensive statements. But see, the people on the one side are speaking in the abstract, and turning their abstract comments on an issue into a concrete judgment on how you handled that issue isn't really fair, because that isn't what those people meant. I mean, you can see that, right? You can see that, by my stating my opinion, I wasn't pointing a finger at you, right? If the fact that I wasn't pointing a finger at you doesn't make you any less offended, I don't know what to tell you, because a) I have a right to my opinion, and b) I'm not going to censor myself on certain issues just to avoid potentially offending someone. But I don't WANT you to be offended--I like you, Jim. I think you're a good dude, and my abstract opinion on breastfeeding in no way means that I see you as a bad father. That said, it IS my opinion. And honestly, I would have been a lot less offended if you had made a new reply in which you quoted what I said and told me that you thought I was wrong. Instead, you made a reference to what I had said in a reply to someone else, and called my opinion ignorant. That pissed me off, and it took a lot of restraint to merely reply by saying "I guess I'm the one that's not good." I used restraint because I like you and I don't want beef. If we could agree to disagree on this issue without you feeling like I'm judging your parenting and without me feeling like you think my opinion is invalid, that would be best, and I hope we can. But if I'm required to retract my opinion in order for shit to be cool, then I feel like shit's not gonna be cool, because I can't in good conscience do such a thing.

So I guess that's where things stand at this point.
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