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658136 Posts in 9262 Topics by 3396 Members Latest Member: - vlozan86 Most online today: 53 - most online ever: 494 (Jul 01, 2007, 02:59:53 PM)
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Author Topic: There is no diaper bigger than the internet (new annoyance thread)  (Read 29583 times)
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Andrew_TSKS
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Posts: 39426


« Reply #400 on: Jul 29, 2008, 04:44:24 PM »

Kids are too often too much like their parents.

qft...assholes beget assholes

Except when they beget horribly traumatized people with no self-esteem.

I speak from experience here.
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sassymcassface
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Posts: 992


« Reply #401 on: Jul 29, 2008, 04:48:19 PM »

pfft i intend to never get over my dislike of kids.

Word to that. Fuck being a parent anytime ever. Other people can do it if they want. I do not want.

if you don't mind me asking, any specific reason why? or just don't like them?
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Andrew_TSKS
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« Reply #402 on: Jul 29, 2008, 04:53:17 PM »

I really don't feel like I've gotten all that much pleasure or enjoyment out of my life. Nor have I really gotten to do the things I want to do. If I were to have a kid now, I'd be in my mid-50s at the earliest by the time I could start actually living for myself again. Why the hell would I want to make some other human that, by virtue of my having done so, I have to be a slave to for at least 20 years? Maybe most other people's teens and 20s are a blast and by the time they hit 30 they feel like they can do that whole "I'm gonna settle down and raise a family" thing and not miss anything. I don't. And considering how perennially frustrating my life is, I doubt I ever will.
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I just want to be myself and I want you to love me for who I am.
Greg Nog
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Posts: 21629


« Reply #403 on: Jul 29, 2008, 05:02:34 PM »

I'll also add that my kid-hatin' is only reinforced by the bad apples...whom I always notice because, really, how can you not?  The good kids (of which I'm sure there are plenty) don't even register, to their credit

The quickest way to notice good kids is teach a classful, and then within a day, you'll be all, "Holy shit, why can't every kid on earth just be like Jafiyah over there?"

I'm psyched to have kids, but who knows when that'll end up being.
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sassymcassface
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Posts: 992


« Reply #404 on: Jul 29, 2008, 06:53:30 PM »

I really don't feel like I've gotten all that much pleasure or enjoyment out of my life. Nor have I really gotten to do the things I want to do. If I were to have a kid now, I'd be in my mid-50s at the earliest by the time I could start actually living for myself again. Why the hell would I want to make some other human that, by virtue of my having done so, I have to be a slave to for at least 20 years? Maybe most other people's teens and 20s are a blast and by the time they hit 30 they feel like they can do that whole "I'm gonna settle down and raise a family" thing and not miss anything. I don't. And considering how perennially frustrating my life is, I doubt I ever will.

i have a lot of the same feelings, but i constantly hear that it is selfish to not want kids.  i don't know if that's just the odd belief that all ladies just wanna pop out babies or what.
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morgan
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« Reply #405 on: Jul 29, 2008, 07:24:11 PM »

How is it selfish to not want kids?  The world is overpopulated enough as it is.  I mean, I have no problem with people having a couple of kids, but saying it's selfish to not want them just seems kind of silly.
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elpollodiablo
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Posts: 32624


« Reply #406 on: Jul 29, 2008, 07:27:27 PM »

I can definitely see the appeal and sort of like nobility in having children and rearing em right.


That said, there's no overpopulation problem in terms of like sheer numbers and there won't be for a long long time as long as we check the growth of multinational capitalism at a few key points
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think 'on the road.'
elpollodiablo
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Posts: 32624


« Reply #407 on: Jul 29, 2008, 07:29:20 PM »

I really don't feel like I've gotten all that much pleasure or enjoyment out of my life. Nor have I really gotten to do the things I want to do. If I were to have a kid now, I'd be in my mid-50s at the earliest by the time I could start actually living for myself again. Why the hell would I want to make some other human that, by virtue of my having done so, I have to be a slave to for at least 20 years? Maybe most other people's teens and 20s are a blast and by the time they hit 30 they feel like they can do that whole "I'm gonna settle down and raise a family" thing and not miss anything. I don't. And considering how perennially frustrating my life is, I doubt I ever will.

Hey Andrew I don't mean this at all to rile you up or nothin buddy but did you ever entertain the possibility that maybe the first 30 years of life have been generally unpleasant because you've been evaluating circumstances in terms of living for yourself?
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think 'on the road.'
girl
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Posts: 9144


« Reply #408 on: Jul 29, 2008, 07:48:40 PM »

OH MY GOD I WANT ONE.

really?  'cause I have extra...

Ooh! I'll take Ian if you're bored with him.
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jebreject
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Posts: 27071


« Reply #409 on: Jul 29, 2008, 08:16:49 PM »

That said, there's no overpopulation problem in terms of like sheer numbers and there won't be for a long long time as long as we check the growth of multinational capitalism at a few key points

Word. The problem is more with distributing resources than it being too many people to provide for.
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DCDave
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Posts: 10387


« Reply #410 on: Jul 29, 2008, 08:21:16 PM »

I don't like the way you guys use the term capitalism to describe protectionist, regulated economies dominated by oligarchies and monopolies rather than markets where the function of government is to assist in bridging information gaps and to internalize market externalities.
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elpollodiablo
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« Reply #411 on: Jul 29, 2008, 08:25:40 PM »

I gotta say, I'm okay with that
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think 'on the road.'
Andrew_TSKS
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Posts: 39426


« Reply #412 on: Jul 29, 2008, 09:46:33 PM »

I really don't feel like I've gotten all that much pleasure or enjoyment out of my life. Nor have I really gotten to do the things I want to do. If I were to have a kid now, I'd be in my mid-50s at the earliest by the time I could start actually living for myself again. Why the hell would I want to make some other human that, by virtue of my having done so, I have to be a slave to for at least 20 years? Maybe most other people's teens and 20s are a blast and by the time they hit 30 they feel like they can do that whole "I'm gonna settle down and raise a family" thing and not miss anything. I don't. And considering how perennially frustrating my life is, I doubt I ever will.

Hey Andrew I don't mean this at all to rile you up or nothin buddy but did you ever entertain the possibility that maybe the first 30 years of life have been generally unpleasant because you've been evaluating circumstances in terms of living for yourself?

I don't actually understand that criticism at all.

Oh, and sassy, the only way I could see not having children as selfish is from the point of view of your as-yet-unconceived potential children, sitting somewhere in limbo going, "You're not letting us live! HOW SELFISH OF YOU!" That strikes me as a religious point of view, and in fact an extremist one. As it is now, my potential children don't exist yet, so I can't, by definition, be DEPRIVING them of anything. Now, if I knocked a girl up and then ran out on her and left her to raise my kid alone, THAT would be selfish.
« Last Edit: Jul 29, 2008, 09:48:33 PM by Andrew_TSKS » Logged

I just want to be myself and I want you to love me for who I am.
G.C.R
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Posts: 6219


« Reply #413 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:01:44 PM »

[
I really don't feel like I've gotten all that much pleasure or enjoyment out of my life. Nor have I really gotten to do the things I want to do. If I were to have a kid now, I'd be in my mid-50s at the earliest by the time I could start actually living for myself again. Why the hell would I want to make some other human that, by virtue of my having done so, I have to be a slave to for at least 20 years? Maybe most other people's teens and 20s are a blast and by the time they hit 30 they feel like they can do that whole "I'm gonna settle down and raise a family" thing and not miss anything. I don't. And considering how perennially frustrating my life is, I doubt I ever will.


I think the problem there Andrew, is nothing to do with your own upbringing, but that you're seeing having a child as being a slave to someone.
I've spent a decent amount of time working as a nanny, sometimes with kids who were pretty difficult (though their mother was more so, and theres some stuff that happened while i worked for them that I think i handled badly and feel very, to-my-dying-day ashamed of) and I alwaysthought that I would never want kids, despite liking them. I'm re-evaluating that, partly because i was with someone who hated kids and swore black and blue that he would never, ever have them. And since I thought we were going to be together forever, I figured it was not an option. Now my life is in a place where maybe one day i will want one, and that door will hopefully be open to me.
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Greg Nog
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« Reply #414 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:03:53 PM »

A potential reason for the use of the term "selfish" in this context might be where family as a whole is seen as more important than its component people, so someone who makes themselves a familial dead-end is essentially saying that their individuality is more important to them than their family.

That said, I think it's total bullshit to accuse anyone of being selfish either for wanting kids or not, and the very assiest kind of normative to suggest that either one is automatically preferable to the other.


EDITed for grammar!
« Last Edit: Jul 29, 2008, 10:05:59 PM by Greg Nog » Logged
Andrew_TSKS
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Posts: 39426


« Reply #415 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:05:12 PM »

OK, Greg, that makes sense to me, and I never would have thought of it on my own. But yeah, I agree with you about it being bullshit.

And G.C.R.--yes, I do seeing being a parent as being a slave to a child. You're absolutely right.
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G.C.R
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Posts: 6219


« Reply #416 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:11:25 PM »

YMMV, etc, but I think theres a lot more to be got out of raising a kid than that would imply.
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Ignatius
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« Reply #417 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:23:45 PM »

Do it right, and the kid's your slave, not the other way around.
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Andrew_TSKS
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Posts: 39426


« Reply #418 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:38:02 PM »

That just makes me think of how my parents permanently damaged my mind when I was a child and didn't know any better than to take them seriously. That's the last thing that I want to pass on to future generations.
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I just want to be myself and I want you to love me for who I am.
silentsigh89
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Posts: 3073


« Reply #419 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:41:17 PM »

I fluctuate between a slightly less extreme version of Andrew's thinking to squeeing like a crazy person at every baby I see to being simply wierded out by the fact that I am biologically old enough to have kids.

Mostly I've learned that I like kids until they are about seven and then they start being mean to each other in a different way that makes me dislike them.
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diesel_powered
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Posts: 19210


« Reply #420 on: Jul 29, 2008, 10:49:49 PM »

I'll also add that my kid-hatin' is only reinforced by the bad apples...whom I always notice because, really, how can you not?  The good kids (of which I'm sure there are plenty) don't even register, to their credit

The quickest way to notice good kids is teach a classful, and then within a day, you'll be all, "Holy shit, why can't every kid on earth just be like Jafiyah over there?"

I'm psyched to have kids, but who knows when that'll end up being.

Totally. Most days, my kids are excellently-behaved and creepy smart. And I subject them to all kinds of crazy shit.
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Anne the Man
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« Reply #421 on: Jul 30, 2008, 02:48:06 AM »

Troof. I had a moment a few weeks ago when I really wanted a kid cos you could pass on all the things you like and value to them. I'm the kind of person who when I get excited about a new band/film/book go tell EVERYBODY that they HAVE to listen/watch/read it, and loan it to them or make a dozen mixes. I get mildly disappointed/frustrated when it doesn't take or they don't bother trying it, but if you had a child IT COULD NOT ESCAPE IT Twisted Evil

Having a child when you didn't want one would be the biggest fucking waste of time and energy, of course.
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Anne the Man
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Posts: 4444


« Reply #422 on: Jul 30, 2008, 02:51:34 AM »

Oh, and OT, I have to pay a $25 charge to my dentist for being late for an appointment and reschedule it til next week. I mean this is supposed to be the cheap dentist and they're putting charges like that? Fucking Christ! I hate dental prices with a passion. Also the fact that you can't pay something that pricey off over time is fuckin' crazy.

I think the pain might be a wisdom tooth coming through as well, and the way Grace described the painnnn of having hers out I'm a bit scared.
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sassymcassface
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Posts: 992


« Reply #423 on: Jul 30, 2008, 11:52:39 AM »

I don't actually understand that criticism at all.

Oh, and sassy, the only way I could see not having children as selfish is from the point of view of your as-yet-unconceived potential children, sitting somewhere in limbo going, "You're not letting us live! HOW SELFISH OF YOU!" That strikes me as a religious point of view, and in fact an extremist one. As it is now, my potential children don't exist yet, so I can't, by definition, be DEPRIVING them of anything. Now, if I knocked a girl up and then ran out on her and left her to raise my kid alone, THAT would be selfish.

i don't really understand where the selfish comes from, maybe the idea that i'm willing to admit that i want to live my life for myself and not be a slave to some other potential being.
i think it'd be more selfish to have a child, and possibly pass on the mass of health problems i have.  i don't want to live with them, why would i knowingly wish them on someone else?

i had when the god-card gets played.  i really think that god is okay with me not havin' the babies.
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edison
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Posts: 4837


« Reply #424 on: Jul 30, 2008, 12:00:17 PM »

I like kids and all, but at this point I don't want to have any, ever - and I am increasingly weirded out by the fact that I'm getting to an age where friends and acquaintances are starting to have kids.

Actually, I haven't seen pretty much one of the only people I consider a friend here in months because he's busy working his ass off to feed his soon-to-be-born kid, and probably will not see him in the next months either, so I'm sort of bitter about that, even though I'm ready to acknowledge that it is selfish and assholish to regret that people are devoting their entire time to their kid(s) if that's what they feel like doing.

(sorry, this is only very tangential to the discussion going on, but it is kind of annoyance, albeit petty, so at least it belongs to this thread in this respect)
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