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657756 Posts in 9259 Topics by 3396 Members Latest Member: - vlozan86 Most online today: 71 - most online ever: 494 (Jul 01, 2007, 02:59:53 PM)
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Author Topic: Overheard conversations  (Read 28214 times)
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peacocks
Registered user

Posts: 4615


« Reply #275 on: Nov 11, 2010, 11:31:08 AM »

Quote
"Remote controlled raptors"

If only the old man in Jurassic Park had this idea.  Samuel L. Jackson would still have an arm.
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dick-check your priviledge
auto-da-fey
Registered user

Posts: 9495


« Reply #276 on: Nov 18, 2010, 01:38:43 PM »

why I love the Gayborhood:

at a bustling coffee shop, there's a moment where the music and various conversations hit a shared pause, which coincides precisely with some guy telling his friend, "I mean, if I was gonna have anal sex with him, I'd have said something."

dude has a cool card; where I'd have acknowledged the moment with a little sheepish grin/shrug mugging, he just carried on unfazed by the numerous quick glances. kudos to him.
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auto-da-fey
Registered user

Posts: 9495


« Reply #277 on: Nov 18, 2010, 01:40:02 PM »

sadly, at the very moment I was typing that, I missed something that inspired same guy to respond, "well, that's just disgusting." my prurient voyeuristic tendencies are very disappointed.
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G.C.R
Registered user

Posts: 6219


« Reply #278 on: Nov 18, 2010, 07:42:09 PM »

Guy on bus: I'll tell you, all I want for Christmas is Sarah and my son back. That's all I want.
Driver: Well, she's staying a Safe House, but I can't tell you where it is. I'm going to go visit her next week though.
Guy: Man, you know I'm gonna be locked up again by then!
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I think it's fair to assume we'll be inebriated and covered in bodily effluvia all weekend
reebty
Registered user

Posts: 1169


« Reply #279 on: Nov 19, 2010, 09:07:22 AM »

.
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Nick Ink
Registered user

Posts: 7018


« Reply #280 on: Dec 20, 2010, 04:29:36 AM »

"I'm going to shoo you off my carcass because I want to eat the intestines from the inside out - that's what veloceraptors did"

Ellie, to Grace, playing with their little dinosaur models.

edit:
« Last Edit: Dec 20, 2010, 04:37:51 AM by Nick Ink » Logged

Seest thou what happens, Laurence, when thou firk’st a stranger ‘twixt the buttocks?!
auto-da-fey
Registered user

Posts: 9495


« Reply #281 on: Dec 21, 2010, 06:19:13 PM »

two dudes are on a first date right in front of me, and one just explained how he dropped out of Narcotics Anonymous because his uncle was in the same group and that was awkward.
the other dude is completely straight edge and mostly always has been.
they seem to be hitting it off. I'm rooting for them. NA dude just said "I don't get, like, twinks."
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auto-da-fey
Registered user

Posts: 9495


« Reply #282 on: Dec 21, 2010, 07:00:41 PM »

45 minutes later, date is still on, but just hit a rocky moment. i was actually focused on my grading and didn't catch the context, but dude #1 said, "so I said, mom, you are a fucking cunt and I hope you die by fire."
dude #2's shocked response: "I would never use that word!"
to #1's credit, he held his ground: "you don't know my mother."
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El_Josharino
Registered user

Posts: 7483


« Reply #283 on: Dec 21, 2010, 07:10:55 PM »

From a phone conversation of one of my coworkers a couple weeks ago. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) I could only hear his half:
"Wait. What is ham gravy?"
"Did it come from the monkeypox house?"
"I dunno, Gooch has a brown recluse running rampant over there."
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Hey sexy mama, wanna kill all humans?
auto-da-fey
Registered user

Posts: 9495


« Reply #284 on: Jan 21, 2011, 05:07:54 PM »

two guys crossing paths at the coffeeshop 30 seconds ago:

"So how was Triumph of the Will?"
"Oh god, so hot. I guess I'm a Nazi now."

now they're discussing . . . Blind Melon.
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kyle
Registered user

Posts: 1478


« Reply #285 on: Jan 26, 2011, 09:04:34 PM »

two guys crossing paths at the coffeeshop 30 seconds ago:

"So how was Triumph of the Will?"
"Oh god, so hot. I guess I'm a Nazi now."

now they're discussing . . . Blind Melon.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Jeb, you know you live in the age of internet thievery, right?
yeah but i like holding things
Anne the Man
Registered user

Posts: 4444


« Reply #286 on: Jan 30, 2011, 08:32:38 PM »

Between two people I passed on the street:

"My name's blast-a-holic"
"Hello blast-a-holic"

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Hey jerks, mind if I watch you jerks do your jerk-bending?
milesofsparks
Registered user

Posts: 5200


« Reply #287 on: Jan 31, 2011, 10:24:51 AM »

boys on the playground while throwing things at each other:

"Well YOUR butt's as big as a DINOSAUR!"
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With some of my research and knowledge I am a little sure about it.
FreddyKnuckles
Registered user

Posts: 11705


« Reply #288 on: Feb 02, 2011, 08:16:20 PM »

The dude in front of me in line at subway was definitely arguing with his sandwich artist about what goes on a blt...
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Quote from: Heathcote
I'm in with Greg Nog, IT'S FUCKING FAFFLE TIME!
G.C.R
Registered user

Posts: 6219


« Reply #289 on: Aug 23, 2011, 09:05:07 PM »

Two bros came and sat next to me in the library and started talking loud, and I was all prepared for the dumb. It started out promising - "Dude, Alexa was totally hitting on me, like hard out, last night. and I kissed her, but it was one of those sobering up 'what the hell am I doing' kisses". They then went on to have an emotional, thoughtful conversation about this girl, and how they shouldn't kiss her because it was mean seeing as how she clearly wanted a relationship and neither of them were prepared for that, and they should take responsibility so she wouldn't get hurt. Ten minutes later: "Dude, we should tell Aaron to quit that shit, paedophile jokes are just never funny." Aw, bros!
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I think it's fair to assume we'll be inebriated and covered in bodily effluvia all weekend
G.C.R
Registered user

Posts: 6219


« Reply #290 on: Oct 06, 2011, 07:53:49 AM »

Dear old gent in foyer of my local cinema with his wife, gestures to poster for Incendies: Oh look, Indecencies! I've been really wanting to see Indecencies!
Me too, old fella.
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I think it's fair to assume we'll be inebriated and covered in bodily effluvia all weekend
Trousers and Pat
Registered user

Posts: 2044


« Reply #291 on: Oct 06, 2011, 09:21:04 AM »

ah ha ha that's great. me too.
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I practice nonviolence, but I preach... ALRIGHT
Ignatius
Registered user

Posts: 7082


« Reply #292 on: Oct 06, 2011, 10:28:24 AM »

Nice! That would have been so much better. I sold tickets for that for a month, and plenty of people made awkward and/or serious attempts to pronounce that 'properly' but not one person made such an excellent mistake.

It's chock full of indecencies, anyhow, but they're the sad kind.
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Greg Nog
Registered user

Posts: 21629


« Reply #293 on: Nov 07, 2011, 12:09:47 PM »

From the next cubicle over:

"The last movie I saw that actually impressed me was probably Avatar.  I'm like, into cinematography? Like Pixar stuff, y'know?"
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elpollodiablo
Registered user

Posts: 32624


« Reply #294 on: Nov 07, 2011, 12:23:13 PM »

Man, this reminds me--back in July I got an email from Overheard in New York saying that they were going to use a submission of mine, but I couldn't figure out when or what I had submitted. Not sure what it was.
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think 'on the road.'
cold before sunrise
Registered user

Posts: 2500


« Reply #295 on: Nov 10, 2011, 08:01:19 PM »

Ask them? It's might be good to know.
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Riding a tidal wave of whiskey on a surfboard made out of don't care.
jm
Registered user

Posts: 4803


« Reply #296 on: Nov 10, 2011, 08:24:23 PM »

[discussing Andy Rooney's death, elevator, NYC 2011]:

BLRG: I don't know, he was some friend of [Andy Rooney's]
GLRB: Mike Douglas?  Mike Wallace?
BLRG: No, it was Rush...rush...
GLRB: Michael Douglas?  M... Morley Safer?  I'm betting it was Michael Douglas
BLRG: Rush... ru...
GLRB: Rush Limbaugh?
BLRG: No, not Rush Limbaugh.  He's a politician.
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His hand is holding my hands, which are rested on his knee.
auto-da-fey
Registered user

Posts: 9495


« Reply #297 on: Jan 10, 2012, 11:51:51 AM »

I'm 98% sure the girl at the table next to me just leaned over and told her friend, "I mean, I basically smell like cum right now."

I'm at a vegan coffeeshop largely populated by crusties, poly people, anarchists, and etc, so I guess that helps make it more plausible. but no less delightful. also, it's the sort of thing people probably overhear my lady and I saying to one another all the time, so
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das kranke Tier
Registered user

Posts: 5894


« Reply #298 on: Jan 10, 2012, 12:33:38 PM »

 Shocked
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Compendious as hell
Greg Nog
Registered user

Posts: 21629


« Reply #299 on: Jan 24, 2012, 11:21:12 AM »

FUCK YES the mail delivery dude is talking to the secretary about the Mayan Apocalypse

YES
YES
YES
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