100 Reasons Why "Ignition - Remix" Is So Damned Great


1. The rhythm is really insistent without being hard - it's got this sort of bossanova groove, just bubbling under the song, easing it gently but irresistably across

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


2. Writing a good "weekend" song is hard to pull off. I fear that the guy who prompted me to begin this thread will say "Nonsense! Anybody can write a good 'weekend' song!" When I see his "weekend" song on the charts, I will concede his point. Until then, I'll note that many, many "weekend" songs are released each year, but very few of them actually poke their heads above the surface. This is because most of them sound forced. R Kelly's greatest gift is his ability to sound natural; engaged; genuine. Even when he's singing in a very mannered fashion.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


3. How is this song in particular a good "weekend" song? For starters, there's the delay in mentioning the weekend. Note a shitty "weekend" song, Loverboy's "Working for the Weekend," for purposes of comparison, which shoots its entire wad in the chorus's first line & then has nothing compelling to say.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


4. Not so "Ignition - Remix." R Kelly delays the song's moment of revelation until the chorus's second to last line:

This is the remix to ignition
Hot and fresh out the kitchen
Mama rollin that body
Got evey man in her wishin
Sippin on coke and rum
I'm like so what I'm drunk
It's the freakin weekend baby
I'm about to have me some fun

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


5. I mean, Jesus Christ, you might as well fault Bob Marley's heartbreaking Wait In Vain because its substance is facile

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


6. "it's not rocket science" right right insofar as rocket science is boring

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


7. But to return to the lyric - what could be funnier than R Kelly's ongoing project of writing new lyrics in which to identify that the version you're hearing is a remix? Think R Kelly doesn't know that that's funny? Where the hell's my boy Trife, he knows what that kind of thinking is called: "racism."

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


8. Of course Kelly knows that it's funny to lead of a chorus with a line like "this is the remix to ignition." Kelly's whole persona, aside from his public/non-album one which has gotten completley away from him, is a greatly controlled, beautifully constructed thing. It's the good-time-lovin'/deep-thoughts-thinkin'/survived-it-and-came-to-tell-you-how-it-looks-from -the-mountaintop friend from your own neighborhood, assuming that your neighborhood was a poor neighborhood in the midwest. (More on this momentarily.) He knows his audience, and his audience wants him to keep it light when he's making a party song. That's what this is about.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


9. Here's where that "more on this momentarily" comes in. Your neighborhood probably wasn't Kelly's poor midwestern block, right? Wrong! Of course it was! Because he goes to great pains to universalize that neighborhood, not through long dull paragraphs like these you're presently reading, but by the miraculously casual tone in which he delivers songs that are anything but casual. Try "The World's Greatest": think there was no malice-of-forethought behind the "ad-libbed" part at the end where he substitutes "I done made it" for "I made it"? Think again. That's there by design. It sells you exactly what you're accusing Kelly doing accidentally: it convinces you (successfully, I'd add) that there's no artifice, no craft to it.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


10. Therefore, R Kelly has won and the terrorists have lost.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


11. The extra beat! The extra m*therfu*king BEAT! It's a held chord, is what it is, but it's the last thing you'd expect - right on the line "Bouncin' on 24s," right when you'd expect it to either go back to the tonic or jump into the chorus, and it just

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


12. hangs

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


13. there

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


14. And then we enter into the levels of reference again, which is where I get completely dizzy "Rollin' on 24s/while they say on the radio": what do they say? Oh, good God, they say what critical theory thought they'd say: "This is the remix to igntion"

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


15. which is to say that the song describes a party where they're listening to the radio play a song describing a party where they're listening to the radio playing a a song describing a party where they're listening to the radio playing a song describing a party and well you get the general idea

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


16. Which is joy itself! The song has absorbed its creators, its listeners, everybody!

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


17. I take back what I said earlier about the song being dumb

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


Holy crap.

-- David Allen (Davidallen@s...), June 15th, 2003.


18. I'm saving the rest of this for tomorrow's Last Plane to Jakarta update, I have to be at work in seven hours (it's midnight now) and I can't stay up any later yammering on about a point as glaringly obvious as the greatness of this wonderful, wonderful song

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


you maniac

-- Jody Beth Rosen (editor@s...), June 15th, 2003.


(if anybody's interested, I really will finish this tomorrow, will probably both post it here & to LPTJ - warning, it'll probably also include why "The World's Greatest" is also quite triffic)

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


19) Rum and coke is severely underrated and underrepresented in the world of weekend party booty jams.

-- scott seward (skotrok@e...), June 15th, 2003.


yeah but then he mentions crystall and god knows that's overrepresented

-- Brian the Snorf (blehr@g...), June 15th, 2003.


" Cristal," actually: personally I liked that weird moment that was all about Alize. Anyway, lovely, John, except the thing about "World's Greatest" is that he does that thing where suddenly he's turned into Sam Cooke, and while that's not nearly a bad thing I still have this reaction where I go "WTF, why is R Kelly turning to Sam Cooke?" and it distracts me from the song itself. (This also has to do with the fact that there's this guy who used to sing in the Chicago subways and was basically a really good Sam Cooke impersonator, and I start feeling like he's on the radio, and that's also disorienting.)

-- nabisco (---@n...), June 15th, 2003.


bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce

-- adam west (diabolik@p...), June 15th, 2003.


20. the vocal phrasing on the line "that's why I'm all up in ya grill/tryin' to get you to a hotel", hiccuping extra syllables out of the vowel sounds in a great rhythm which I've most definitely ripped off for a hi-hat pattern.

-- Al (hotelopera@a...), June 15th, 2003.


21. in the car, 2 months ago:

me: is this a coke ad?

nancy: yeah, i think so.

me: this sure has been on a long time

nancy: yeah.

me: holy fuck, this is that r kelly song everyone on ilm is talking about!!

nancy: wow.

me: i hope they play it again.

nancy: yeah.

me: is THIS a coke commerical?

nancy: i'm really confused now.

-- jess (dubplatestyle@h...), June 15th, 2003.


Yeah, Al, that's a good one.

22. Am I the only one who thinks he sounds like he's been through some shit on this song? Maybe that's my projecting real life onto the song. There's just way too much soul for a song about downing mix drinks, and you can almost here him trying. I mean, it sounds like he really needs to have fun this freakin' weekend or he's gonna stress out.

Actually, that's only in part of the song, and that juxtaposed with his obvious lust for partying has a great effect.

-- Adam A. (newaddress@b...), June 15th, 2003.


23) i played it at this party and everyone was juiced and all these punk rock girls sang along with the BUT SO WHAT IM DRUNK line!!

-- trife (#@#), June 15th, 2003.


It occurs to me I've not heard this song.

-- Ned Raggett (ned@k...), June 15th, 2003.


24. He spreads the melodies through the lines, in fact he carries the flow of a particular harmony across a whole verse like... er..... Dose One, I guess.

-- nick.K (kilroy@g...), June 15th, 2003.


I like the colour scheme in the video - it stood out on MTV

'thru ma 'fro' - wordplay. sweet.

-- s.r.w. (sean@s...), June 15th, 2003.


25. That synth line in the background of the chorus! It sounds like the Human League!

26. There's something about the production that sounds stripped down just enough so it seems to (cough) "bear the devices"--I'm thinking of the drum fills just before the chorus, and the aforementioned synth line, even the way he double-tracks his vocals ("Sippin' on coke and rum [rum]/I'm like so what I'm drunk [drunk]")....It's like each device calls a bit of attention to itself because the overall production is so sparse (by contemporary standards). Even the relatively langorous way he sings "bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce" (I take it she's bouncing very slowly) calls more attention to that word than a typical R&B/hiphop track where "bounce" would be one of a zillion instructions spit out in 20 seconds or less.

-- amateurist (amateurist@h...), June 15th, 2003.


27. The asides in the lyrics: "I'm like, 'So what...'"

28. The good grammar: "Food everywhere / as if the party was catered"

-- amateurist (amateurist@h...), June 15th, 2003.


29. I have to say this song fills me with a slight bit of hometown pride (I know someone who went to R. Kelly's high school! etc.) despite his rather foul offstage behavior. I picture R. hanging out at one of those massive Jackson Park BBQs with ragga blasting out of 10-ft-high amps.

-- amateurist (amateurist@h...), June 15th, 2003.


30. "I don' normally do this but, uh..."

-- amateurist (amateurist@h...), June 15th, 2003.


31. When in fact he does normally do this - unless there's some Ignition Mega-Mix 12" coming (we should all be so fortunate), Kelly is claiming that he doesn't normally release the remix at all, then saying he'll let you hear a little of it, and then just playing it.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


32. And, well - precisely: this is more of that quality Kelly brings to the table that has enabled him to stay strong at the cash register longer than many: it's the dreaded "A" word, you know, "authenticity," all the baggage that carries.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


33. Not the authenticity of "here's my soul," though that's in there, too, and more about it later. The authenticity of "here's what I got, seems good, I'm not gonna mess with it much more." The authenticity of sufficiency, not excellence. The authenticity of excellence is exactly why so many people vomit when other people start goin' on about authenticity.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


34. I'm like, so what, I'm drunk.

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


35. But what we're going to have to come back to is what Nabisco brings up & it's where any hyperbole in which we've been engaging will really find its feet and start doing the Charleston. "WTF, why is R Kelly turning into Sam Cooke?" because R Kelly is Sam Cooke

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


36. OK I have to go to work now (it's a quarter 'til seven in the morning), everybody keep the reasons coming

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


37. YOu don't even need to own a copy to hear it all the time, just turn on the radio, or if you live in the city open the window.

-- nick.K (kilroy@g...), June 15th, 2003.


38. i dislike it profusely

-- stevem (blueski@b...), June 15th, 2003.


39. It makes me want to buy a shotgun.

-- Alex in NYC (vassifer@e...), June 15th, 2003.


40. stevem and Alex are...The No-Fun Brigade!*

*I have also expressed the same feelings about this song, but I was wrong.

-- Neudonym (zinoguy@k...), June 15th, 2003.


41. Because the video has a 360-degree shot of R.'s incredible braidwork, and a funny "white guy learns to dance" part, and shout-outs to dead homiez.

-- Neudonym (zinoguy@k...), June 15th, 2003.


42. Because the entire first verse has been reconstructed to sound like it's a prelude to a song that then (once the chorus kicks in) suddenly exists.

-- Neudonym (zinoguy@k...), June 15th, 2003.


43. r kelly does not sport a 'fro in the video

44. r kelly has never once sported a 'fro to my knowledge

45. does this mean he referring to hair, um, elsewhere than his head?

-- jess (dubplatestyle@h...), June 15th, 2003.


46. The way the original "Ignition" seagues into the remix on Chocolate Factory

-- Colin Beckett (Colin42@m...), June 15th, 2003.


47. Toot toot.

-- Vinnie (palpable@v..), June 15th, 2003.


48. Beep beep.

-- Arthur (tabren1234@a...), June 15th, 2003.


49) The 'stirring dance'

-- William Bloody Swygart (thingummy99@y...), June 15th, 2003.


50) His green-and-white wristband.

-- William Bloody Swygart (thingummy99@y...), June 15th, 2003.


I kiss all of you so much right now.

-- Cozen (fm/am/md/cd@-...), June 15th, 2003.


51. The very second before a Hip Hop artist (with a huge 'fro') was about to go on stage came over and confessed his love for the track, knowing that I loved it. A memorable moment for me as it was a risky time, months before the anyone had broken cover and rhapsodised about it.

52. It doesn't sound like a 'real' song, rather some studio experiment, or album interlude.

-- nick.K (kilroy@g...), June 15th, 2003.


53. ok I'm back

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


54. There's the sudden change in vocal tone in the chorus, right at "mama rollin' that body" - where R Kelly reveals himself to be not just a consummate soul singer, but a pretty clued-in one. Loop that damned line. "Mama rollin' that body": who's that? It's not Kelly. I mean it is him singing, but whose moves is he copping?

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


55. reggae, it's something reggae: dancehall specifically

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


56. Elephant Man? No, gentler

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


57. Ini Kamoze? No, that was what I thought, too, but no

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


yeah, I thought the same thing--but I can't really identify what artist

-- s1utsky (parrisactavan@y...), June 15th, 2003.


58. Oh Christ it's Shaggy, where the hell did that come from?

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


59. Would anybody who's not comfortable with having their contributions posted as part of my weekly Last Plane to Jakarta update please say so before the thread's over, thanks

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


60. Yes I am aware that technically speaking that last one is not a reason why "Ignition - Remix" is so damned great, and neither is this one for that matter

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


61. But hey, what can you do?

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


62. Anyhow

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


63. (note also that the whole feel of the remix owes a fair amount to Buju Banton, of all people)

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


64. let's posit that somebody involved with this record has heard some dancehall

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


65. and let's further posit that R Kelly is that guy, which is a lot more probable than the "oh-but-he's-do-dumb" crowd would like to admit, but all the disparate elements in his style suggest either the happiest accident of all time or a remarkable keen ear for when to put what where

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


66. I actually hear a little bit of Prince in it. I can't be too specific or refer to any particular song (though I could hear the backing track fitting in fairly well on Sign O The Times), but it's a general feeling. Maybe it's the keyboards. Like the best Prince songs, it has an ability to make you feel vicariously smooth and sexy, even if you are not a particularly smooth or sexy person.

-- Matthew Perpetua (fluxequalsrad@h...), June 15th, 2003.


Why would anyone doubt that R Kelly has heard some dancehall?

-- s1utsky (parrisactavan@y...), June 15th, 2003.


67. Spot-on Matthew, Prince is in here

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


68. So's Curtis Mayfield

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


...the glasses...because he wants to

-- s.r.w. (sean@s...), June 15th, 2003.


69. And Marvin' freaking GAYE

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


70. So we've got the feeling of lots of reggae that most Americans have sadly missed just ripping across the front of the track, and this dumb weekend lyric that's not actually dumb, hitting-on-a-dozen-points vocals flexing so effortless that you might be forgiven for thinking it was guileless

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


71. since after all that effect is the point

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


69. that 180 degree head shot in the video is classic.

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


That video online anywhere?

-- s1utsky (parrisactavan@y...), June 15th, 2003.


70. Julio you're right, this thread warrants at least two 69s

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


71. Haven't seen the video

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


72. Where was I? Oh yeah

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


73. A dozen disparate elements in play all at once and that's when Kelly throws in the deep emotional vocal timbre that is his unique gift, and it's just where "adamwest" said it was:

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


74. "bounce bounce bounce bounce"

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


75. I mean listen to that, for the love of heaven listen to it, it's the depthless endless joy of pop music compressed into one word repeated four times

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


76. john you have to see that video!

77. you'll spend the rest of yr time wondering abt that one shot.

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


78. gotta be R's a big Orson Welles fan from the sound of it - crazy, crazy times

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


79. beyonce's new single is great.

80. at least as good as kelly rowland's last one

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


81. twenty posts to go and it's finally getting away from me

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


82. (if you don't hear reggae on that one line, you're not listening, I mean it's blatant)

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


83. the vibrato, the misplaced depth of feeling, the totality of it: "bounce bounce bounce bounce"

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


84. (“Is the small reggae toast bit in the chorus fundamental to the song?” well yes it's fundamental, it's a pop song, every line is fundamental)

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


85. (especially the ones in the chorus)

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


86. ok now where was I - oh yeah

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


87. come on john you're nearly there!

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


87. but beyond the pop joy of "bounce bounce" it's the sound of beleaguered R Kelly, whose troubles are known to even a casual pop listener but are known well by exactly the people who he'd rather knew nothing about them: people like me, the people who bought TP-2.com even though it had one of the worst album titles of all time

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


89. if its in the charts its a pop record

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


90. I'm tryin' Julio but ss wants to argue with me, you know how hard a time I have resisting arguments

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


91. and he doesn't number his post like i'm doing

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


92. dude I appreciate it more than you know, next time I'm in London the pints're on me

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


93. assuming you're in London I mean

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


94. yes i am.

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


95. the shameful video & the rejected-by-Chicago-radio business & his sudden unwanted transition from known-but-not-huge pop star to universally-known-and-laregly-shunned tabloid coverboy, he's pushing that all to the side and taking aim

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


96. and where is his aim

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


97. well let me just answer that question

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


98. with a question:

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


99. "Where the party at?"

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


100. Thank you, good night

-- Iced_Up (editor@lastplanetojakarta.com), June 15th, 2003.


good night.

-- Julio Desouza (julio@d...), June 15th, 2003.


101) then after the show its the aaaafter paaaarty / and after the party its the hotel lobbbbby

-- trife (#@#), June 15th, 2003.

-LPTJ-
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